Over my nine and a half decades of life, I have concluded that counting our blessings is far better than recounting our problems. No matter our situation, showing gratitude for our privileges is a fast-acting and long lasting spiritual prescription.
Surviving through that darkest hour and coming out into the light again when we look back and see what the journey was, with an infinite joy and gratitude that we did not choose the easy path, because we can now see that it led to the lower ground, the smaller reward.
The greater the distance between the giver and the receiver, the more the receiver develops a sense of entitlement.
Furthermore, when I was hired, I experienced immense gratitude largely because I did not have such expectations, surely more gratitude than if I had expected the job. For most people in most circumstances, expectations are unnecessary impediments to happiness. When expectations are unfulfilled they cause gratuitous pain, and when they are fulfilled, they diminish gratitude, the most important element in happiness.
The combination of taking a spouse for granted and not feeling or expressing gratitude to them is fatal to most marriages.
The disadvantages of having expectations-lowered gratitude when they are fulfilled and gratuitous pain when they are not-greatly outweigh any advantages expectations may have.
How do you begin minimizing expectations? First, do not fear that not having expectations will make you either less optimistic or less successful. Second, acknowledge, the destructive role that expectations usually play in your life. Third, take an inventory of your life and begin to express gratitude for all the good in it. With each thing for which you regularly express gratitude, you will implicitly end your expectations of having it.
Third, instead of allowing the enormity of the world's suffering to make me unhappy, I have allowed it to increase the depth of my gratitude for the blessed life that I have been allowed to lead.
Aside from giving the universe meaning, religion infuses the individual's day with transcendence, provides a supportive community for life's best and worst moments, teaches gratitude, bonds parents and children, keeps the individual in touch with the past and hopeful for the future, offers the individual regular opportunities to get in touch with the holy, teaches self-control, and provides meaningful holy days, not merely days off-all of which are essential to happiness.
those who set aside the bottle of bitterness and lift instead the goblet of gratitude can find a purifying drink of healing, peace, and understanding.
We sometimes think that being grateful is what we do after our problems are solved, but how terribly shortsighted that is. How much of life do we miss by waiting to see the rainbow before thanking God that there is rain?
Being grateful in times of distress does not mean that we are pleased with our circumstances. It does mean that through the eyes of faith we look beyond our present-day challenges.
Being grateful in our circumstances is an act of faith in God. It requires that we trust God and hope for things we may not see but which are true.8 By being grateful, we follow the example of our beloved Savior, who said, “Not my will, but thine, be done.”9
True gratitude is an expression of hope and testimony. It comes from acknowledging that we do not always understand the trials of life but trusting that one day we will.
In any circumstance, our sense of gratitude is nourished by the many and sacred truths we do know: that our Father has given His children the great plan of happiness; that through the Atonement of His Son, Jesus Christ, we can live forever with our loved ones; that in the end, we will have glorious, perfect, and immortal bodies, unburdened by sickness or disability; and that our tears of sadness and loss will be replaced with an abundance of happiness and joy, “good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over.”10 It must have been this kind of testimony that transformed the Savior’s Apostles from fearful, doubting men into fearless, joyful emissaries of the Master. In the hours following His Crucifixion, they were consumed with despair and grief, unable to understand what had just happened. But one event changed all of that. Their Lord appeared to them and declared, “Behold my hands and my feet, that it is I myself.”
Your testimony of Christ, born of the Holy Ghost, can help you look past the disappointing endings in mortality and see the bright future that the Redeemer of the world has prepared.
Gratitude is a catalyst to all Christlike attributes! A thankful heart is the parent of all virtues.
You oughta be thankful, a whole heaping lot, For the places and people you're lucky you're not!
You're a fortunate guy. And you ought to be shouting, "How lucky am I!"
Thank goodness for all the things you are not! Thank goodness you're not something someone forgot, and left all alone in some punkerish place like a rusty tin coat hanger hanging in space.
Feelings of gratitude activate three main areas in the brain: the brain stem region that produces dopamine, the primary reward chemical; the reward center, where dopamine is released; and the anterior cingulate cortex, which helps us focus on information that is relevant and communicates between the brain’s thinking and emotional circuits, says Alex Korb, a neuroscientist. “Your psychological well-being depends less on the things that happen to you and more on the things you pay attention to,” says Dr. Korb, author of “The Upward Spiral: Using Neuroscience to Reverse the Course of Depression, One Small Change at a Time.” “Gratitude will shift your brain’s attention.”
Pride is a sin that can readily be seen in others but is rarely admitted in ourselves. Most of us consider pride to be a sin of those on the top, such as the rich and the learned, looking down at the rest of us. There is, however, a far more common ailment among us—and that is pride from the bottom looking up. It is manifest in so many ways, such as faultfinding, gossiping, backbiting, murmuring, living beyond our means, envying, coveting, withholding gratitude and praise that might lift another, and being unforgiving and jealous.
Your children will know the security of a home where dwells the Spirit of the Lord. You will gather them together in that home, as the Church has counseled, and teach them in love. They will know parents who respect one another, and a spirit of respect will grow in their hearts. They will experience the security of the kind word softly spoken, and the tempests of their own lives will be stilled. They will know a father and mother who, living honestly with God, live honestly also with one another and with their fellowmen. They will grow up with a sense of appreciation, having heard their parents in prayer express gratitude for blessings great and small. They will mature with faith in the living God.
[The fact is] most putts don't drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration. Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old-time rail journey--delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts. Interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.
In her book Thrive, Huffington Post founder Arianna Huffington explained how researchers from the University of Minnesota and the University of Florida found that writing down a list of positive events at the close of a day—and why those events made us happy—lowers stress levels and gives us a greater sense of calm at night.
...journaling is a powerful way to empty your mind of stress.
This year, I’m thankful for the UPS driver, the FedEx driver and the Amazon Prime driver. I’m also thankful for the people at Zoom (even though I curse them) and the guy who just upgraded my internet connection (even though I had to wait a month for him to get to me.).
We take so many of our freedoms for granted. The Bill of Rights, every freedom in the Constitution, the freedom to move around freely. Every good and decent thing we enjoy was paid in blood by men and women who put on a uniform and then went away.
He is well paid That is well satisfied.
“Take away the serpents from us,” they pled. But apparently the Lord did not, even when Moses prayed about it, because the serpents were not the problem. The real problem was lack of faith and an attitude that caused the Israelites to complain constantly, and to blame God and Moses for every difficulty. If the Israelites had gone to Moses and said, “Pray unto the Lord, that He might take away our rotten attitudes from us,” this story might have a different ending. But to them, bad attitude was not the problem. Snakes were the problem. The Lord’s response was to have Moses make a brass snake and place it on a pole where people could find it and look at it. With the sculpted serpent came the promise: “Everyone that is bitten, when he looketh upon it, shall live.” (Numbers 21:8.) The number of fiery serpents did not diminish at all. They remained in all their poisonous plenty to remind Israel about the genuine issue. As we would expect, the Lord’s response dealt with the real problem, and attempted to teach trust, faith, and gratitude, in much the same way as His response to the question of the brother of Jared about light in the barges.
When I learned that their rehearsals had been cut short and that many of the numbers had not been rehearsed by the entire group, I was astonished. No one would have known. The Lord had indeed made up the difference.
What’s interesting is that we are incapable of being angry and grateful simultaneously.
Most people are not good at forgiveness but they’re good at blame. It’s human nature. So I suggest we put our strength to good use. If you’re going to blame someone for all your pain, then you’ve got to blame them for all your joy, too. If you’re going to blame God for all your tragedies, you’ve got to blame God for all your gifts. If you’re going to blame your parents for being so terrible, you’ve got to blame them for the strength it gave you later on.
It’s an illusion that someone accepting blame, or offering an apology is going to solve or fix what actually happened. The only thing that’s going to solve things is deciding to free yourself from the story of what happened to you and take hold of the truth that all things are made new through faith in a higher purpose.
A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving...
Joy in Ordinary Moments Joy comes to us in ordinary moments. We risk missing out when we get too busy chasing down the extraordinary.
True gratitude comes from knowing that you belong in the infinite dance of life.
""Joy subsumes happiness. From The Book of Joy “Joy subsumes happiness. Joy is a far greater thing. Think of a mother who is giving birth. Almost all of us want to escape pain. And others know that they are going to have pain, the great pain of giving birth. But they accept it. And even after the most painful labor, once the baby is out, you can’t measure the mother’s joy. It is one of those incredible things that joy can come so quickly from suffering.â€""
Joy is much bigger than happiness. While happiness is often seen as being dependent on external circumstances, joy is not.
Joy does not arrive with a fanfare, on a red carpet strewn with the flowers of a perfect life. Joy sneaks in, as you pour a cup of coffee, watching the sun hit your favourite tree, just right. And you usher joy away, because you are not ready for it. Your house is not as it must be, for such a distinguished guest. But joy cares nothing for your messy home, or your bank-balance, or your waistline, you see. Joy is supposed to slither through the cracks of your imperfect life, that's how joy works. You cannot invite her, you can only be ready when she appears. And hug her with meaning, because in this very moment, joy chose you.
We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.
By and large, I have come to see that if we complain about life, it is because we are thinking only of ourselves.
Joy does not simply happen to us. We have to choose joy and keep choosing it every day.
Let yourself sit quietly and at ease. Allow your body to be relaxed and open, your breath natural, your heart easy. Begin the practice of gratitude by feeling how year after year you have cared for your own life. Now let yourself begin to acknowledge all that has supported you in this care: With gratitude I remember the people, animals, plants, insects, creatures of the sky and sea, air and water, fire and earth, all whose joyful exertion blesses my life every day.With gratitude I remember the care and labor of a thousand generations of elders and ancestors who came before me.I offer my gratitude for the blessing of this earth I have been given.I offer my gratitude for the measure of health I have been given.I offer my gratitude for the family and friends I have been given.I offer my gratitude for the community I have been given.I offer my gratitude for the teachings and lessons I have been given.I offer my gratitude for the life I have been given.Now shift your practice to the cultivation of joy. Continue to breathe gently. Bring to mind someone you care about, someone it is easy to rejoice for. Picture them and feel the natural joy you have for their well-being, happiness, and success. With each breath, offer them your grateful, heartfelt wishes: May you be joyful.May your happiness increase.May you not be separated from great happiness.May your good fortune and the causes for your joy and happiness increase. Sense the sympathetic joy and caring in each phrase. When you feel some degree of natural gratitude for the happiness of this loved one, extend this practice to another person you care about. Recite the same simple phrases that express your heart’s intention. Then gradually open the meditation to other loved ones and benefactors. After the joy for them grows strong, turn back to include yourself. Let the feelings of joy more fully fill your body and mind. Continue repeating the intentions of joy over and over, through whatever resistances and difficulties arise, until you feel stabilized in joy. Next begin to systematically include the categories of neutral people, then difficult people and even enemies until you extend sympathetic joy to all beings everywhere, young and old, near and far. Practice dwelling in joy until the deliberate effort of practice drops away and the intentions of joy blend into the natural joy of your own wise heart. Excerpt: The Wise Heart
Be thankful every morning when you get up that you have something to do that day, which must be done, whether you like it or not.
Whatever makes you weep may it open your eyes to beauty Where your heart has hardened may it crack open and let the light flood in Whatever worry squirrel-cages in your mind may it animate your creativity Whatever pettiness worms through your door may it teach you to laugh gently at your very human self May all the wrong turns you’ve taken the fumbles, stumbles every epic screwup lead you to this meadow this river this beloved this work this burning bush that was waiting for you.
I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, 'Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.'
I have been the guy who has everything but yet is so one-track minded about what I want, that I can't see my blessings.
Among other wonders of our lives, we are alive with one another, we walk here in the light of this unlikely world that isn't ours for long. May we spend generously the time we are given. May we enact our responsibilities as thoroughly as we enjoy our pleasures. May we see with clarity, may we seek a vision that serves all beings, may we honor the mystery surpassing our sight, and may we hold in our hands the gift of good work and bear it forth whole, as we were borne forth by a power we praise to this one Earth, this homeland of all we love.
I give thanks for arriving Safely in a new dawn, For the gift of eyes To see the world, The gift of mind To feel at home In my life. The waves of possibility Breaking on the shore of dawn, The harvest of the past That awaits my hunger, And all the furtherings This new day will bring.
The only time you ever have in which to learn anything or see anything or feel anything, or express any feeling or emotion, or respond to an event, or grow, or heal, is this moment, because this is the only moment any of us ever gets. You're only here now; you're only alive in this moment.
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and, creates a vision for tomorrow.”
Think of JOY as a more meaningful type of happiness. ’Hedonistic happiness’ is fleeting, and only includes emotions we tend to think of as positive. ’Eudaimonic happiness’ includes meaning, growth, and acceptance. Even of emotions we may call negative.
The twelfth century Buddhist lojong texts about mind training state that, “Joy is our essential nature, something everyone can realize. We could say that our desire for happiness is in a way, an attempt to rediscover our original state of mind.†According to The Dalai Lama, “The suffering from a natural disaster we cannot control, but the suffering from our daily disasters we can. We create most of our suffering, so it should be logical that we also have the ability to create more joy. It simply depends on the attitudes, the perspectives, and the reactions we bring to situations and to our relationships with other people.†He also reminds us of the adage, “Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.†Psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky that shows only 50% of our happiness is determine by set factors like our genes or temperament. The other half is determined by our attitudes and actions, which we can control.According to Lyubomirsky, the three factors that seem to have the greatest influence on our happiness are: 1. Our ability to reframe the situation more positively, 2. Our ability to experience gratitude, and 3. Our choice to be kind and generous.
As often happens on the spiritual journey, we have arrived at the heart of a paradox: each time a door closes, the rest of the world opens up. All we need to do is stop pounding on the door that has just closed, turn around - which puts the door behind us - and welcome the largeness of life that now lies open to our souls. The door that closed kept us from entering a room, but what now lies before us is the rest of reality.
Rejoicing in ordinary things is not sentimental or trite. It actually takes guts. Each time we drop our complaints and allow everyday good fortune to inspire us, we enter the warrior's world.
The universe is not outside of you. Look inside yourself, everything that you want you already are.
When I run after what I think I want, my days are a furnace of distress and anxiety, if I sit in my own place of patience, what I need flows to me, and without any pain, from this, I understand that what I want also wants me, and is looking for me and attracting me, there’s a great secret in this for all who can grasp it.
How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!
Perhaps, in utilizing our human capacity to build on the foundation of generations before us, we have inadvertently become so focused on our own building that we have forgotten the foundation that holds it up.
All text, no title, no author. Happiness lies not in finding what is missing, but in finding what is present.
The ultimate source of happiness is within us. Not money, not power, not status. Outward attainment will not bring real inner joyfulness. We must look inside.
The cosmos is filled with precious gems. I want to offer a handful of them to you this morning. Each moment you are alive is a gem, shining through and containing earth and sky, water and clouds. It needs you to breathe gently for the miracles to be displayed. Suddenly you hear the birds singing, the pines chanting, see the flowers blooming, the blue sky, the white clouds, the smile and the marvelous look of your beloved. You, the richest person on Earth, who have been going around begging for a living, stop being the destitute child. Come back and claim your heritage. We should enjoy our happiness and offer it to everyone. Cherish this very moment. Let go of the stream of distress and embrace life fully in your arms.
To be aware of your body is the beginning of self-love. When the mind goes home to the body, the mind and body are established in the here and now.
Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.
Self-love is the nourishment that gives us the clarity and strength to love others well.