Until now, however, I have never talked in general conference about the most basic and fundamental—and perhaps the most important—of all councils: the family council. Family councils have always been needed. They are, in fact, eternal.
When you start looking at life through the lens of a 3-year-old, it's like your whole filter changes. Everything you look at is like a painting that's been restored. Everything is alive again, because you just don't take it for granted.
...In today's culture, a provocative and unsettling idea runs directly counter to [the instinctive desire to belong]. We could call it the waning of belonging - the growing assumption that in order to remain completely free and unshackled, no one should belong to anyone else. Children don't belong to parents; husbands don't belong to wives; nobody belongs to anybody. Thus many today honestly wonder whether the bonds or kinship and marriage are valuable ties that bind - or sheer bondage.
True greatness is found only in the family...our greatest joy would be to live together everlastingly as a family unit in eternity. There neither is nor can be anything greater than this.
Studies show—and stories of children affirm—that there are three key pieces of emotional nutrition our kids need to thrive: the love of their mother, the love of their father, and stability. When one of these three elements is missing, children can be emotionally malnourished. Wanting the love of your mother and father is not a social construct. It is a deep, primal, soul-level need.
Drill down into any social ill and you’ll see that children from broken families are over-represented in every single risk category. From drug abuse to suicide, incarceration to homelessness, children that are emotionally starving for love and a relationship with their mother and father contribute to our most pressing social issues. 71% of pregnant teens are fatherless. 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes—5 times the average. 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes—32 times the average. 47% of children living in poverty are fatherless—4 times higher than children with married parents. We put billions of dollars into social programs that seek to band-aid the gaping wound left by family break-down, and still our children are floundering. Why? Because the government cannot love a child.
Governments may be able to make having a family easier through subsidies, childcare, work-life balance programs, but these programs often “don’t change the math” on having more children. Public policy alone cannot make people value having children more than a career, new cars and clothes, or vacations. Dominant cultural norms must be factored in. This becomes evident when we observe that the wealthiest nations often have the lowest fertility rates, while the most food-insecure countries tend to have the highest. More attention must be paid to the cultural messages, importance of parenthood, and the perceived value and benefits of having children.
You cannot pay people enough to take on the life-altering costs of raising children if they do not already want children.
Just as family work increases the bonding time between family members so it is with recreation. So why should we separate them as values? ... While work primarily bonds the minds, and yields a product, recreation bonds the hearts and strengthens relationships.
The family is human ecology. People are born into families, and each individual does his or her part to make the family strong. In turn, communities and societies are the products of families cooperating with one another to promote mutual benefit and protection.
...government, and society itself, exist in order to help families thrive, not the other way around.
Even today, where it thrives, the family structure probably does more than 90 percent of the heavy lifting for government and society. The institution of the family carries a burden government cannot bear — and this becomes most obvious in places where the family is weakest as an institution. The government would collapse as a simple matter of math if it had to care for everyone's children as their parents currently do.
No other success can compensate for failure in the home.
Nothing can take the place of home in rearing and teaching children, and no other success can compensate for failure in the home.
The strength of Belief/Belonging created by a ritual increases with the Effortfulness its practice entails.”[3] From this vantage, challenges to ritual, if met by the necessary effort to overcome them, serve to magnify a ritual’s power. The repeated testimony of these diverse families is that in ritual, as in weight training, difficulty and strain are benefits in disguise.
I have but one regret, and that is that I did not feel it my duty to play with my children...I worked very hard and was tired at night. Now I have none to play with.
A society, for example, in which individual consent is the only constraint on sexual activity is a society in decay. Adultery, promiscuity, out-of-wedlock births,15 and elective abortions are but some of the bitter fruits that grow out of the ongoing sexual revolution. Follow-on consequences that work against sustainability of a healthy society include growing numbers of children raised in poverty and without the positive influence of fathers, sometimes through multiple generations; women bearing alone what should be shared responsibilities; and seriously deficient education as schools, like other institutions, are tasked to compensate for failure in the home.16 Added to these social pathologies are the incalculable instances of individual heartbreak and despair—mental and emotional destruction visited upon both the guilty and the innocent.
If enough of us and enough of our neighbors strive to make our decisions and guide our lives by the truth of God, the moral virtues needed in every society will abound.
For he has had his eye upon the chosen spirits that have come upon the earth in the various ages from the beginning of the world up to this time…The Lord has sent those noble spirits into the world to perform a special work, and appointed their times…and their future glory and exaltation is secured unto them; and that is what I understand by the doctrine of election spoken of by the Apostle Paul and other sacred writers: For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son, that he might be the first-born among many brethren.
Your most important friendships should be with your own brothers and sisters and with your father and mother. Love your family. Be loyal to them. Have a genuine concern for your brothers and sisters. Help carry their load.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints views the family as the most important organization in time and all eternity. The Church teaches that everything should center in and around the family. It stresses that the preservation of family life in time and eternity takes precedence above all other interests.
Some people ask me as a Church leader why we place so much emphasis on the home and family when there are such larger problems around us? The answer is, of course, that the larger problems are merely a reflection of individual and family problems.
Strong families cultivate an attribute of effective communication. They talk out their problems, make plans together, and cooperate toward common objectives. Family home evening and family councils are practiced and used as effective tools toward this end.
The love we know here is not a fleeting shadow, but the very substance that binds families together for time and eternity.
After all, eternity will be but an extension of righteous family life.
In all ages prophets have looked down through the corridors of time to our day. Billions of the deceased and those yet to be born have their eyes on us. Make no mistake about it-this is a marked generation. There has never been more expected of the faithful in such a short period of time than there is of us. Never before on the face of this earth have the forces of evil and the forces of good been so well organized. Now is the great day of the devil’s power. But now is also the great day of the Lord’s power…. While our generation will be comparable in wickedness to the days of Noah, when the Lord cleansed the earth by flood, there is a major difference this time: God has saved for the final inning some of His stronger and most valiant children, who will help bear off the kingdom triumphantly…. You are the generation that must be prepared to meet your God….The final outcome is certain-the forces of righteousness will win.
Of all the joys of life, none other equals that of happy parenthood. Of all the responsibilities with which we struggle, none other is so serious. To rear children in an atmosphere of love, security and faith is the most rewarding of all challenges. The good result from such efforts becomes life’s most satisfying compensation.
No family can have peace, no life can be free from the storms of adversity unless that family and that home are built on foundations of morality, fidelity, and mutual respect.
Here is one of the tragic reasons for mounting juvenile delinquency: literally millions of children who come from homes where there is no parental love and consequently very little child security. Here is a root cause of our soaring public welfare burden, which is devouring billions of our treasure. Here is a denial of the kind of family ordained of God from the beginning. Here is heartbreak and failure.
To those of you who, with glad hearts, dream of marriage and the establishment of a home, I wish to repeat what was said of old: “Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it.” (Ps. 127:1.)
May I quickly suggest four cornerstones upon which to build that house? There are others, but I choose to emphasize these. They come of the gospel of Jesus Christ. They are not difficult to understand nor difficult to follow. They are well within your reach with a little effort; and I do not hesitate to promise you that if you will establish the home of which you dream on these foundation stones, the perils of your married life will be diminished, your love for one another will strengthen through the years, you will bless the lives of your children and of your children’s children, and you will know happiness in this life and joy eternal.
The first of these I call Respect for One Another, the kind of respect that regards one’s companion as the most precious friend on earth and not as a possession or a chattel to be forced or compelled to suit one’s selfish whims.
This respect comes of recognition that each of us is a son or daughter of God, endowed with something of his divine nature, that each is an individual entitled to expression and cultivation of individual talents and deserving of forbearance, of patience, of understanding, of courtesy, of thoughtful consideration. True love is not so much a matter of romance as it is a matter of anxious concern for the well being of one’s companion.
Companionship in marriage is prone to become commonplace and even dull. I know of no more certain way to keep it on a lofty and inspiring plane than for a man occasionally to reflect upon the fact that the help-meet who stands at his side is a daughter of God, engaged with Him in the great creative process of bringing to pass His eternal purposes. I know of no more effective way for a woman to keep ever radiant the love for her husband than for her to look for and emphasize the godly qualities that are a part of every son of our Father and that can be evoked when there is respect and admiration and encouragement. The very processes of such actions will cultivate a constantly rewarding appreciation for one another.
We seldom get into trouble when we speak softly. It is only when we raise our voices that the sparks fly and tiny molehills become great mountains of contention. To me there has always been something significant in the description of the prophet Elijah’s contest with the priests of Baal. The scripture records that “a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks … but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake:
There is need for a vast amount of discipline in marriage, not of one’s companion, but of one’s self.
I know of few more meaningful statements for fathers and for fathers-to-be than this counsel given by President David O. McKay. Said he: “A father can do no greater thing for his children than to let them feel that he loves their mother.”
I repeat, the voice of domestic peace is a gentle voice
I am convinced that there is no better discipline nor one more fruitful of blessings than for those who establish homes and families to follow the commandment given to ancient Israel through the prophet Malachi: “Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, … and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.” (Mal. 3:10.)
Marriage usually brings with it the incurring of many obligations. To you, my young friends, I should like to suggest that you make it your first obligation to live honestly with God in the payment of your tithes and offerings. You will need his blessings; oh, how much you will need them! I give you my solemn testimony that he does that which he has promised to do. Among those blessings will be peace in the home and love in the heart.
As you discipline yourselves in the expenditure of your means, beginning with your obligations to your Father in heaven, the cankering selfishness that leads to so much strain in domestic affairs will go out of your lives, for if you will share with the Lord whom you do not see, you will deal more graciously, more honestly, and more generously with those whom you do see. As you live honestly with God, you will be inclined to live honestly with one another.
I know of no single practice that will have a more salutary effect upon your lives than the practice of kneeling together as you begin and close each day. Somehow the little storms that seem to afflict every marriage are dissipated when, kneeling before the Lord, you thank him for one another, in the presence of one another, and then together invoke his blessings upon your lives, your home, your loved ones, and your dreams.
God then will be your partner, and your daily conversations with him will bring peace into your hearts and a joy into your lives that can come from no other source. Your companionship will sweeten through the years; your love will strengthen. Your appreciation for one another will grow.
Your children will know the security of a home where dwells the Spirit of the Lord. You will gather them together in that home, as the Church has counseled, and teach them in love. They will know parents who respect one another, and a spirit of respect will grow in their hearts. They will experience the security of the kind word softly spoken, and the tempests of their own lives will be stilled. They will know a father and mother who, living honestly with God, live honestly also with one another and with their fellowmen. They will grow up with a sense of appreciation, having heard their parents in prayer express gratitude for blessings great and small. They will mature with faith in the living God.
The destroying angel of domestic bitterness will pass you by and you will know peace and love throughout your lives which may be extended into all eternity. I could wish for you no greater blessing, and for this I humbly pray in your behalf, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
The most important of the Lord’s work you and I will ever do will be within the walls of our own homes
My dear friends, you are a royal generation. You were preserved to come to the earth in this time for a special purpose. Not just a few of you, but all of you.
We owe our families the kind of relationship we can take into the presence of God. We must try not to give offense or take offense. We can determine to forgive quickly and fully. We can try to seek the happiness of others above our own. We can be kind in our speech. As we try to do all these things, we will invite the Holy Ghost into our families and into our lives.
The family is the most important unit in time and in eternity and, as such, transcends every other interest in life
Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.
As the family develops so will society, as a whole, develop.
It is not a far step to the doctrine that after the earth work has been completed, and exaltation in the next estate has been attained, one of the chief duties of men and women will be to beget spiritual children.
It is one of the rewards of intelligent development, that we may be to other spiritual beings, what our God has been to us.
Trust the guides you have been given from Him, rather than turning solely to the world to measure your personal worth and find your way.
We should remember, as Latter-day Saints, that outside of the celestial kingdom, there is no family organization. That organization is reserved for those who are willing to abide in every covenant and every obligation which we are called upon to receive while we sojourn here in this mortal life.
In April of 1843, the Prophet told Benjamin F. Johnson “that he would preach a sermon that day for me, which I would understand, while the rest of the congregation would not comprehend his meaning. His subject was the ten talents spoken of by the Savior, ‘unto him that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundantly, but from that hath not (or will not receive) shall be taken away that which he hath, (or might have had.)’ Plainly giving me to understand that the talents represented wives and children as the principle of enlargement throughout the great future, to those who were heirs of Salvation”
Korihor was an anti-Christ. Anti-Christ is antifamily. Any doctrine or principle our youth hear from the world that is antifamily is also anti-Christ. It's that clear. They [the youth] need to know that if it's antifamily, it's anti-Christ. An anti-Christ is antifamily.
When our children slip into seasons of waywardness, we might better endure the challenges by remembering who they really are and why God has strategically placed them in our family.
We must keep in mind that because our children were assigned to come forth in the last days, they are targets for the Adversary. We are clearly taught that children born in the Covenant in the last days have come to earth with the singular assignment to prepare the world for the Savior’s Second Coming. Therefore, our children, who are born or adopted into the lineage of Israel are “marked” for greatness because of their former greatness.
According to the Population Studies Center at the University of Michigan,“The amount of time children spent eating meals at home is the single biggest predictor of better academic achievement and fewer behavioral problems," and “Mealtime is more influential in the lives of children than time spent in school, studying, attending religious services, or playing sports.”
The nature of male and female spirits is such that they complete each other. Men and women are intended to progress together toward exaltation.
The family is the center of life and the key to eternal happiness.
Families create stability and continuity.
Out of all of Heavenly Father’s spirit children, a smaller group distinguished itself by its exceeding faith in the Lord Jesus Christ during the conflicts that occurred incident to the war in heaven. Those who were valiant in these conflicts, and in other ways also, demonstrated both their abilities and their desires to become actively involved in the cosmic work of redemption through the great atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ.
If my children will live a better life than I did by my getting brain damage, by my being brain dead, then let it be.
What I want to do in life is just be a respectful man and just take care of my children and guide my family in the right direction.
Back when I was a kid, I never liked the kind of kids that my kids have become. They're privileged and have things very easy. But I'm proud of them.
everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush, anxious for greater development and greater riches. Children have very little time for their parents and parents have very little time for their children and for each other. So the breakdown of peace in the world begins at home.
So the breakdown of peace in the world begins at home.
Nothing is more important to the relationship between family members than open, honest communication.
President Kimball said, "Could the Lord have prevented these tragedies? The answer is, Yes. The Lord is omnipotent, with all power to control our lives, save us pain, prevent all accidents, drive all planes and cars, feed us, protect us, save us from labor, effort, sickness, even from death, if he will. But he will not. "We should be able to understand this, because we can realize how unwise it would be for us to shield our children from all effort, from disappointments, temptations, sorrows, and suffering. . . . If we looked at mortality as the whole of existence, then pain, sorrow, failure, and short life would be calamity. But if we look upon life as an eternal thing stretching far into the pre-earth past and on into the eternal post-death future, then all happenings may be put in proper perspective."
Elder Orson F. Whitney wrote, "No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted." Such cosmic conservation! He continues, "It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God." (Ibid., p. 4.)
Isn't it interesting that of the many ways in which the Lord might have phrased the object of the "thou shalt" in the second great commandment, He chose the word neighbor—not mankind, not organizations, not people, and not society, but neighbor. In keeping the second great commandment, the most significant and basic service we can regularly render unto others will emerge from our most basic roles—as brothers and sisters, as parents, as neighbors, as disciples. What we do vocationally and professionally matters, of course—and sometimes very much. But those of us who try to escape from, or neglect, our basic roles will find that we have only made the effective keeping of the second great commandment even more difficult. Keeping the commandments and sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ are the two most relevant things we can do to assist our fellowman in our time. In addition to keeping the second commandment by direct service to others, what a service we render others when we do not commit adultery or steal, even though these become more and more fashionable!
Let us think of service not only as giving, but also as receiving righteously. Parenthetically, one of the many reasons some of today's children have not learned to give is that some parents do not know how to receive.
Our capacity to grow and to assist each other depends very much upon our being "willing to communicate." (1 Timothy 6:18) Communication includes proper measures of counsel, correction, and commendation. Since we depend upon each other to supply these ingredients in our lives, our insensitivity in communicating can be far more damaging than we realize. When we "pass by" others and "notice them not," a degree of deprivation occurs. (Mormon 8:39.) One of the ways, therefore, we will be "proved herewith" is our determination as to whether or not we love others enough to give and to receive such vital communications. We may quickly say that communicating thusly with those close to us is difficult; indeed, it is, but with whom else is it really possible? Are not the people proximate to us our tiny portion of humanity, given to us by God as our social stewardship? We can scarcely attain that attribute of sainthood—being "full of love" (Mosiah 3:19)—unless we are willing to communicate by giving and receiving appropriate counsel, correction, and commendation.
Yes, one of the great challenges of life is for us not to give justifiable offense, nor to be offended. This can be more easily avoided if our brotherhood and sisterhood are real—and if we are willing to communicate, including the difficult giving and receiving of counsel, correction, and commendation. Helping relationships always involve some weighty communications. The true Christian is a communicator.
It is so easy to pass by, especially when we are busy and when we are on the equivalent of the other side of the street. We are busy being busy. We are often actually less generous with our time than with our money. We keep forgetting where our time comes from!
Corrective counsel is facilitated when there is shared expectation that it will be given.
If we truly care about giving counsel and correction, in addition to taking the time to ponder beforehand the content and substance, we will make certain that our voice tone, bodily posture, and facial expression "are all enlisted," so that the moment draws the best out of us, in order to have the best chance of completing the communication circuit. Timing is often as crucial as content.
We ought to listen as carefully to those we supervise as to those who supervise us. You and I are usually pretty good at paying attention upward, but we are not nearly as good at heeding that which comes from other directions. Likewise, while parents are to teach their children, my, how we can learn from them at times!
We should, therefore, without being artificial, regularly give deserved, specific praise. One of the reasons for doing this is that we are all so very conscious of our shortcomings that it takes a persistent pattern of appreciation to finally penetrate. We are so certain, sometimes, we do not really have a particular skill or attribute that we severely discount praise. One of the reasons we need regular praise from "outside auditors" is to offset the low level of self-acknowledgment most of us have.
Commending communications ought to flow from us without too much concern with "the balance of trade." There is a straight and narrow path of communication, and off to each side are the perils and pitfalls of poor communication that is too caustic, too flattering, too little, too much, too general, too narrow, too soon, and too late. In the case of commendation in particular, sometimes it comes too late to be maximally helpful. Further, if we are not careful (and there is this tendency sometimes in the Church), we may be a little artificial and flowery. We are quick to discern undeserved praise, which we then discount—along with the credibility of the giver. Sometimes we even communicate too soon. We have all had the experience as parents of being so anxious to praise our children that we sometimes overpraise them before their job is done.
We ought to build a climate around us in which we are, in all situations, open to the comments of others. We should not make it too expensive emotionally for others to try to communicate with us. If it is too hard to do so, people will just pull back. If we are too well protected and too well defended, they are not going to extend themselves overmuch in an effort to communicate with us. It is difficult to say which is most dangerous—the mote in one's eye or the moat around his "castle" that keeps out the needed communications, involving correction, counsel, or commendation.
Perhaps our difficulties with receiving justified reproof stem from our thinking of love as being all sweetness. Love surely includes sweetness. But love must sometimes be tough love, sinew as well as sweetness. So it is with loving communication also.
If our efforts to communicate with someone are tied to their role rather than our regard for them, these efforts will not survive when that individual's role changes. If our friendship is a matter of function, what do we do when the function is changed or dissolved—cease caring? This is a bigger block to communication than we may care to acknowledge. While the blocks that seem to get in the way of brotherly communication include the obvious, much restraint no doubt reflects the fact that communication is not risk-free. Communication opens the windows of our soul—and what is inside will be seen. Communication, of course, needs to take careful account of the realities of our mortal relationships in order to avoid errors.
Thus one of the biggest blocks to Christian communication is that we are so afraid of being misunderstood. So, when in doubt, we withhold. Yet Paul said to speak the truth in love; we can then take the chance. We worry (and understandably so) that some communications will only produce more distance. But silence is very risky, too.
Usually, when we do not know somebody, it is difficult for us to trust them, and this becomes a restraint upon communication and growth. Opening the windows of the soul helps us to build healthy relationships. But if those windows are always closed or the blinds are drawn, it is difficult to help; one simply does not know what is needed.
Our self-esteem is stretched, however, only as we are stretched, and true humility includes believing in and exploring our own possibilities.
Besides, a neighbor is apt to hold to a view all the more until he has a chance to explain it. Counsel is more apt to be received after listening has occurred.
If we received a genuine and regular flow of deserved recognition and appreciation, we would be freed from the concerns over whether or not we are valued and whether or not we are going to get credit for something. We would know that we are valued—whether or not a particular idea of ours makes its way through the network successfully! When life is seen as good, a bad day can easily be absorbed.
Our pride should not hold us hostage when we have erred, nor should we mourn our mistakes for the wrong reasons. Yet correction, when it comes, is seldom welcome, and often the issue becomes "Can we take it?" Yet those who have proved that they can "take it" usually have so much to give!
Effective communication provides much of the material out of which rich relationships are made.
Let us in our ministry be nondiscriminatory in the giving of commendation. True, he who is down spirited needs to be lifted up. True, those who are fledglings in the faith may need extra encouragement and deserved, specific praise. But meanwhile, let us not forget the often unnoticed, faithful veterans, lest, like the son who stayed loyally at home and saw the banquet and benefactions given to the prodigal son, the faithful wonder if they are truly appreciated. Let us not assume that another has no need of commendation. Let us give it even if the other does not seem to need it, for we need to give commendation in any event.
Let us never unwittingly turn others in the direction of the praise of the world merely because they are so starved for the praise of the righteous!
Also, we must realize that every word and every act influences the thinking and attitude of the child. It is in the family that the child picks up the elementary lessons in getting along with people and the virtues of love, compassion, and concern.
We all know that every nation is ultimately at the mercy of its families...If families are riddled with problems, society eventually collapses under the weight of problems too vast for any government to meet. If families are strong, society is strong.
The prophets in this dispensation have taught us that special spirits were reserved to come forth at this time in this last dispensation. You are among those very special spirits!
So first of all, remember to be patient. This can take time—especially when the frequency of your interactions is every two years versus every four to six months. The challenge you face is a data challenge. The impression members of your extended family have is based on experiences, third party information exchanges between relatives, and distant memories—the kind that feel 100% fresh and accurate, but are more likely half distorted and fuzzy. All these things come together to form impressions which remain long after the data supporting them has ceased. And while communication can help in this type of situation, what really needs to happen is to alter their data stream, or in most cases, create a whole new data set based on who you are today.
So to put it rather bluntly: a grossly disproportionate number of the people making serious decisions about Europe’s future have no direct personal sibling, child or grandchildren’s interests at stake in that future. They are not part of a family and have come to see all their attention focused on one dominant and all-powerful social unit to which they pay obeisance and give their complete and devoted attention: The State.
And why is an ascendant statist/globalist political culture so hostile to the family? The crisis of the family is not simply a result of changed sexual mores or feminist ideology, while they contribute to it. It has far deeper roots. The family has lost its social significance because to the State, the family is a threat. As a precursor and basic unit of life it preceded the state and always balanced its interests.
But in the last fifty years, the welfare state has done everything in its power to break it up. Dividing families, encouraging divorce, supporting abortion, coercing fatherlessness, and building dependencies, the state has not idly watched in the demise of the family structure: it has been the active and primary cause of its very plight.
As one pundit put it, “the State became master of the family; the result is that the family is now truly the agent, the slave, and the handmaiden of the State.”
The nations themselves are no longer the collection of their many member families but have become a centralised Babylon, known as Brussels, the unionised functional state over all states.
At this point religion has certainly been relativized and fully privatised, if indeed it still is practised in Europe. The so-called bureaucratic elites or ‘experts’ in government and education (the new high priests) determine all policy—including that affecting the family. As a result of their policies, the family is a victim of the culture war.
In other words, by failing to note the mediating structure the family is, we have killed the baby. Indeed the bourgeois family is among all else, the source of attitudes — dare we say virtues — individuality, privacy, enterprise, thrift, discipline, and propriety, which are synonymous with western values and of modernization.
Loving life means realising and multiplying the gift of life. The place where that takes place is the family. Aristotle himself taught that family represents nature in its clearest manifestation. He said, “The family is the basic cell of all human society, the primary association of human beings.”
Reproduction is no longer popular, it appears; people wait or forego having children altogether because they want their own careers and see the ever escalating costs of child rearing. Some have no confidence in our future; still others believe in the planet or its environment more than the human species.
statement from the First Presidency of the Church: "The home is the basis for the righteous life, and no other institution can take its place nor fulfill its essential functions." When we put our homes in order, we put in order our lives and help also to put in order the world.
Speaking of this affluence, one youngster said: "Kids are caught between the values given them as desirable by their churches, schools, and parents on one hand and on the other the spectacle of mothers and fathers both working with great concentration to get 'things.'"
A man should never neglect his family for business.
It’s hard to believe that the world is experiencing a population “implosion” rather than “explosion,” but it is happening. The notion of falling fertility runs counter to the onslaught of public messages we’ve all received over the years.
The perfection of the family is worth any sacrifice because, as has been taught, “no other success can compensate for failure in the home.”2 The home is where our best work is done and where our greatest happiness is attained.
Your success as a family, Our success as a society, Depends not on what happens in the White House, but on what happens in your house.
My parents are my backbone. Still are. They're the only group that will support you if you score zero or you score 40.
Family choices follow a similar pattern. In the Father's plan, the role of families is clearly set forth. In 'The Family: A Proclamation to the World,' we read: 'The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ.'14 It is fairly common in today's world, in another paradigm shift, to trumpet alternative choices in a positive way that are in direct conflict with this plan and that are unfavorable to marriage and family: The choice for both women and men to put education and careers ahead of marriage and family. The choice to purposefully have no or few children15 or to terminate pregnancy when it is inconvenient. The choice to engage in immoral conduct as a substitute for the sacred institution of marriage. The adversary has targeted women and has painted motherhood as a dead-end road of drudgery. He has targeted men and has painted fatherhood as unimportant and fidelity as 'old school.' The alienation and objectification created by pornography is an example of immoral conduct being substituted for the sacred institution of marriage. It underscores the horrific turning from truth and righteousness that the adversary seeks. Inappropriate alternative choices are painted as appropriate in helping to achieve the worldly goals of freedom and equality. As a result of such choices, the average number of children a woman will bear in her lifetime is declining dramatically. It is estimated that 46 percent of the world lives in countries in which the fertility rate is below 2.1 children'the rate necessary for the population to remain stable. Most European and Asian countries are below this level. Italy and Japan are both at about 1.3 births. Japan is expected to decrease in population from 120 million to about 100 million by the year 2050.16 This worldwide decline in population has been described by some as a 'demographic winter.'17 Many countries are not having enough children to replace the generation that is dying.
The men of our society, when not performing the role of stay-at-home parent themselves (as so often is the case) need to be taught to see the worth of the parent who stays home. There needs to be a change within our society in how we speak to and about homemakers. If our only marker of success is what you do in the workplace, how can we ever achieve that degree of equality?
To be happy at home is the ultimate result of all ambition.
Until now, however, I have never talked in general conference about the most basic and fundamental—and perhaps the most important—of all councils: the family council. Family councils have always been needed. They are, in fact, eternal.
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