My principle for helping others is to always ask, “How will my potential help influence their future behavior?” This question is crucial because if you really want to help, your goal should not just be to alleviate present suffering, but future suffering as well.
Your compassion should direct you not just to immediate relief, but to total pain. Otherwise, you might act in a way that makes you and them feel good now, but produces much more pain in the long term.
While there are many things you can do to help a loved one in need, there are some things that must be done by the Lord.